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London Calling
By Mike | April 9, 2008
Somebody once told me, “Harry Potter? That shit’s for nerds.” She was a bitch.
I’ve never read any of the Harry Potter books; I’ve always been a little intimidated by their size and having a pretty bad case of ADD doesn’t help. When fellow FungDarker, Shawn, mentioned at dinner the other night that he’d gone through all of the Harry Potter series on audio book I thought this would be my best bet of ever “reading” the actual books. It’s cool to see what was left out of the big screen adaptations and I can now say that the books are far superior to the movies. I’ve still got a few books left to go but I’m powering through those now.
Yep, lately it’s been Harry Potter morning, noon and night. Which I’ve enjoyed but my wife hasn’t been as happy with my Potter “obsession”.
I don’t know what her fucking problem is. I’ll admit that I’ve been a little obsessive with the Harry Potter books but that’s just because they’re so fucking good and I’m anxious to finish. But my wife thinks that I’m beginning to go a little overboard.
It started when I called her a ‘dirty muggle’ during a heated argument the other day. She got over that quickly but when I bought an owl she really got pissed. I told her that I was going to train it to deliver mail but Queen Negativity made me quickly return the bird.
Now she says that listening to the audio books has begun to influence the way I talk. I don’t know what she’s talking about. We were heading to dinner the other day and I was telling her about a co-worker of mine who had particularly annoyed me that day and afterward she said that I was talking like the books. Here is a recap of the conversation. You be the judge.
Wife: Maybe he was trying to annoy you.
Me: Well that’ just rude, isn’t it?
Wife: What did you say?
Me: What?
Wife: That’s British talk, you’ve been listening to too many Harry Potter books.
Me: No, I haven’t.
Wife: You would have never said it that way before you started listening to those books.
Me: Come off it. You’ve been right out of order ever since I’ve been listening to Harry Potter.
Wife: What does that even mean?
Me: Don’t be daft.
Wife: I want a divorce.
Me: Oh, brilliant! No skin off my arse, mate. Plenty of birds out there interested in me.
(end scene)
Now, how exactly is that in any way different then the way I normally talk? Don’t worry though, after a long talk we’ve decided not to get a divorce, we’re just going to take a break(again). Now I get to listen to Harry Potter as much as I want with zero bitching. Cheers!
Topics: Funny Shit, Movies |
One Response to “London Calling”
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April 11th, 2008 at 8:24 am
I told you so!